Seems that God was just about done creating the universe. The Lord had a couple of leftovers in his bag of creations, so he stopped by to visit Adam and Eve in the Garden. He told the couple that one of the things he had to give away was the ability to urinate while standing up. “It can be very handy,” God explained to Adam and Eve. “Would either of you like that ability?”

Adam popped a cork. He jumped up and begged, “Oh, give that to me! It seems the sort of thing a man should be able to do. Please, Lord, let me have that ability. I would be forever grateful.”

Eve just smiled and shook her head at Adam’s display. She told God that if Adam really wanted it so badly, then she really wouldn’t mind if he were the one given the ability to urinate while standing up.

And so, the Lord gave Adam the ability to urinate while standing up. Then, He looked back into his bag of leftover gifts. “Now, what have we here? Oh, yes, multiple orgasms…”

Vocabulary Help

  • ability – habilidadee
  • able – capaz
  • begg – implorar
  • couple – casal
  • forever grateful – eternamente grato
  • gift – presente
  • give away – dar, distribuir
  • handy – útil
  • jump up – saltar, pular
  • just about done – quase terminado
  • leftovers – resto
  • look bak – olhar novamente
  • shake (shake, shook, shaken) – balançar
  • smile – sorrir
  • stand up – de pé
  • tell (tell, told, told) – dizer, contar
  • wanted it so badly – querer desesperadamente
  • wouldn’t mind – não se importar